We had a couple of moments somewhere…if I think deeply I can almost see them. Of course, they aren’t seen. They’re felt. Honestly, I can only pull a moment of riding in the car with my hand on the gear and having a slightly smaller hand find it’s way onto mine.

That was miles ago, but I thankfully can pull some good out of something that turned out somewhat less than happily ever after.

I’m out of Doritos.

Man…I am thankful for terabyte hard drives. I have begun the process of scanning every picture that my ex-wife has in her possession of our time together while we were married, mostly for the benefit of getting my children when they were younger.  Now the good news – because space (via hard drives) is no longer an issue, I can scan at 300 dpi and get printable shots for future use, like a wall plastered with shots of me and my children. Nice.

We actually look happy in some of these pictures. This is a good time to remember my wife when she was awesome…to me, at least. My children? Always awesome.

And so is Ace Frehley’s “New York Groove”. Rock it.

Am I supposed to be this perfect dad in order to write a blog about my time as a dad? Hope not, because I have some serious issues that need some overcoming…now. Where to start.?

In my hometown of Atlanta, GA, a very popular radio personality has just passed away. He collapsed at 43 years of age. 1 year older than me. I really respected this guy and was very saddened at the news. He left behind a 4 & 2 year old daughter. I can’t begin to process that.

Now…I am not in the best of shape. You wouldn’t call me fat but you’re not going to beg me to train you at the gym, either. This is not the first time I’ve been scared about my health. It is the first time that I’ve heard of someone my age just dying by collapsing. I guess I am that age.

My children deserve better…a healthier father. So this is it.

I’m not talking about P90X or training for a marathon. No. I’ll do this the normal way. I’ll do cardio and weights; start slowly but be consistent. And yes, I will finally eat better.

Maybe this year I’ll be able to take my shirt off in public? Yep…this year.

In just 3 short years, I’ve learned that carrying hate, anger, bitterness, etc, etc…in me is like me kicking myself everyday. 3 short years. So this New Year, I begged God to release me of this incessant dialogue that has erupted within me. He said okay.

On a lighter note, my son thinks he is a badass on his new Tony Hawk BMX bike. I might have fed him some of this optimism.

The grocery store is a scary place. I know…this seems pitiful…a single dad having trouble with groceries. But try out your observational skills the next time you are at the grocery store. Look at the carts of the moms that are shopping – looking like pros. I’ve done this and I have learned that commercials are, indeed, effective.

Overly sugared cereals; white bread; cases of soda, frozen dinners; single pack juices; convience foods ranging from snack packs, lunchables…and I could go on. This list will not build a healthy child.

I know what my problem is: I always shop unprepared, and that problem comes from not having a line-up of good meals that I can cook. This leaves me turning circles in the aisles. There has got to be a better way than this.

Time to look at iPhone apps for more help. I might rely on this phone a bit too much……..nah.